Monday, August 20, 2007

Mayday! Mayday! I'm going down.....

I blew it.

Just completely blew it.

I had the best of intentions today. I was going to eat strict, or at the least smart. I didn't do either this afternoon. I ate like a pig with it's head in the trough.

*snort* Oh chocolate! Is this bad for me? *snort* Yeah.. this'll probably make me sick after I eat it. I really shouldn't. *snort, bite, gulp* Yum.. gotta have some more of that! Just another bite...*snort, chew, slurp* What else can I inhale around here after I'm done? *snort, slurp* Uh... is that a fry up my nose?? *snort, snort* When is dinner?? *snort*

I think I know what's going on, although it's not an excuse.

First, I tried cutting way back on diet soda. That should be a good thing, right? I'm not so sure it is for me. While I certainly need to get my minimum of water in, I think not having any Diet Rite in the house has been more harmful than helpful. I really think the Diet Rite helps curb any cravings I might have. Since I haven't had any soda around, I've indulged in other things to deal with cravings. I've ate quite a bit more than normal and I'm no longer in ketosis.

Second, I'm a severe emotional eater and have not conquered those demons. My emotions are running on high today. My hubby was one of 3 being considered for a job. A job that will be better for all of us. He'll be home every night instead of traveling and the pay will be at least as good as he gets now. It will require a move, but we were planning on that anyhow. So hubby calls me today to tell me that the guy he sent his resume to called him this morning. He was very impressed and wants hubby for the job. He is no longer considering the other two candidates. This man is forwarding hubby's resume to another man, who has the final say-so, and recommending hubby for the job. I think he said the two men were to have a meeting tomorrow so we may know something soon. Stuff like this makes me anxious and I tend to want to eat or sleep through it. Eating is a bad idea and sleeping isn't really an option either.

So anyway. I flubbed big time today. Thank goodness tomorrow is a new day. I doubt I'll even eat tonight. My stomach is rebelling big time.

I'm listing reasons I should never go off plan here. I'm going to print it off, laminate it, and carry it everywhere I go.

Reasons I Should Stick To My Diet

#1. I'll feel reeeaaallllly icky!
#2. I'll bloat like a balloon!
#3. My IBS, GERD, etc. will come back!
#4. I'll beat myself up for sabotaging myself!
#5. I'll gain weight.
#6. I'll continue to gain weight because it will set off my old bad habits!
#7. My long-term health will be compromised!
#8. My clothes will get tight, or worse yet not fit at all!
#9. I'm setting a bad example for my kids and others who are watching me!
#10. I deserve better!

I'm just a little peeved at myself. I promise I'll be over by tomorrow.


oceans said...

Get right back on track, Amy, and everything will be OK!!! Maybe stick to a little bit of Diet Rite for now. It sounds like such a positive change coming into your life! I know change can be stressful, but think of all the good things that will come!!!

Sparky's Girl said...

Thanks Oceans! I know I'll get through this.. one day at a time. *breathe in, breathe out*

Anonymous said...

Hope you have a better day today, Amy. Hey, it's a new day, right?
And don't waste your valuable time worrying about the Diet Rite--it's a wonderful, wonderful product that has zero calories, is made with sucralose, and has a lot less junk than most of the sodas out there--I keep plenty in my house--it has gotten me through plenty a rough time.
Hang in there.
Hope hubby gets some good news ASAP!

Sparky's Girl said...

Thanks Adam! I'm doing much better today. I'm glad to hear I'm not the only one who seems to use diet rite to get through. :0)
I'll keep you posted on the jobs stuff!